As the weeks rolled into months, i realised i couldn't do without Tosin. I had vowed not to fall for any man till i get my degree but falling for Tosin was totally out of my control. Later i got scared he may not feel the same way i felt so i tried to cover my emotions especially when we are together.
Who wouldn't fall for Tosin anyway?
He's handsome, tall, chocolate in skin colour, jovial, spiritually strong, matured, knows how to make ladies giggle, strong, intelligent, speaks eloquently, goal oriented, likes talking about what you'd want to hear like family and it's vices....... In short, he's a definition of what we'd call a perfect husband material.
Later, i started keeping off just to prevent myself from fantasising unnecessarily about him. I didn't know whether he got the message but he drifted apart too and i was glad he did. He was already messing with my head and i couldn't afford that. Besides, i wasn't the only one he was friendly with. All the sisters in church and also the ones in school like him so i felt that's just his nature and that there was really nothing special about our friendship.
"I'm sorry if i scared you. I just didn't know how else to make you come here fast without sounding hasty about it" he replied
I sat down beside him and folded my arms.
"Hope all is well sha. You look rather pale" i said, taking a closer look at him. "Or is it Final year that's doing you like this" i joked and he chuckled.
"Not really" then he paused and got up. He walked towards the next pavement and walked back. Then he stood before me.
"Gina! Do you remember the first day i saw you? The day rain fell and you were dusting your slippers at the auditorium entrance"
"Yes, i do. What about it?" i asked anxiously.
Tosin sighed and smiled again.
-Oh! Not that killer smile again-
"That was the day i knew you were gonna be mine" then he paused, probably giving me time to let the words sink.
He held my hand and looked so deep into my eyes.
"I took my time to get close to you for months and i realised you are just all i need to be a better man in life. What else could i ask for but for a woman deeply rooted in Christ and who sees greatness in me" he paused again and rubbed my hands.
I could almost hear my heart beating fast but i tried to keep my cool. I swallowed some saliva that has been stuck in my mouth since he started talking. I couldn't even blink, my eyes were so fixed on his.
"I love you Gina, so much.......and i want you to agree to take this life journey with me"
Finally, i blinked. It was like i was out of this world. I tried to move my hands, he noticed and released his grip.
I cleared my throat.
-Wait! Did he just ask me out?-
I got up and backed him. I gave a large grin silently just to make sure he didn't see me, then i cleared my throat, changed my countenance and faced him.
"Uhmmmmm, Bro-ther Tosin. Really i don't know what to say. Well, I've heard all you said and I'm sure you've had your conviction about me. I just need to get mine too. I hope you understand me" i said, as frankly as possible. It wouldn't be nice to sound cheap to him. Even as much as i liked him, i wouldn't want to jump into accepting him that way.
"I deeply understand Gina, but please don't take too long. I need you to fill up this empty space in my life"
-Awwwww, i feel like blushing now-
I cleared my throat and smiled.
We talked about some other things. His project, what he'd be doing after school and also some things about church then he saw me off to my house and went back.
I got into my room and jumped on my bed. Then i laughed heartily. Yes! I was happy!
"Wow! A whole Tosin! Asking me out! Out of all the ladies he sees on daily basis"
I laughed again.
"I really need to gist Tinu"
I grabbed my phone and placed a call through to Tinu's line.
"Baby girl, what's up?" her voice sounded from the other end.
"I'm more than fine o. You won't believe what Tosin told me this evening"
"Is he getting married?"
Tinu was my only gisting mate and i gist her virtually about everything that goes on in my life. She had always joked she wouldn't be surprised if Tosin comes one day and tells me he's getting married to one other sister in church after leading me on. She was the first person who called my attention to me having feelings for him since i wouldn't stop talking about him. According to her, she knows guys like that, who leads different sisters on, making them believe he'd propose to them one day, then come one day after you have done everything to be a 'good wife material' to give you their wedding Invitation card. I usually laugh whenever she said that so i wasn't surprised when that was her first guess.
"No na" i laughed. "Well, maybe he'd be getting married but to meeeeeee" i screamed.
"Wait! Gina! He asked you out?"
"Yeeeeeeeeeees" i screamed again
"Aaaaaaaaaah" Tinu screamed over the phone. I almost went deaf.
"Oh my God! Baby girl! I'm so happy for you. Finally! The player took a step" she joked.
"I've already told you he's not a player ooo" i replied sharply
"Eeeh, see someone trying to be defensive oo"
We laughed together
"But i still need to pray about it. It's just too good to be true, don't you see?"
"Hmmmmm" Tinu sighed. "Well, you deserve the best baby girl but you still need to pray about it. Just don't jump into it because the feelings is mutual and by the way, don't let your heart cloud your head o. Because i can see you are in love already"
We both laughed again.
"It's true o" she continued "This is the more reason why you must hear God well so you won't go with your heart, instead of your head"
"Hmmmm, you are very right Tinu. I will pray fervently about it"
"Good. I will join you too, i can't afford to let one guy from only God knows where to come and take my sweetie pie away. He'd have to do more than telling you sweet words"
We got into another round of laughter.
"I even trust you jare"
Tinu and i talked for another 2mins before we eventually said our byes.
I got an insight into what Tinu said about using my head, not my heart. Out of all the decisions in life, choosing a life partner is the most delicate, my Mum mentioned that always. I got on my knees and prayed before i started doing other things.
I saw Tosin on my way to school the following day. He was also on his way to the campus so we walked together. I was surprised he didn't mention anything about what he told me the day earlier. I guessed he was just trying to give me space and i really appreciated that. We talked about casual things and went our way. Immediately we parted ways, i looked back at him and our eyes met. He smiled but i pretended like i didn't see him.
Even with my feelings for Tosin, i still had a 7day fasting and prayer just to be sure I was actually going into the right relationship.
Getting into a relationship has been quite difficult for me due to my life experiences. Most guys find me attractive but i haven't really given anyone the chance since it's been from one hell to another for me.
I determined to make this my first and probably my last.
By the time i finished my fasting and prayer, i was fully convinced about Tosin. I felt it was too soon to give him a reply since he only asked me a week ago so i decided to play hard to get for a while.
After about 2weeks, Tosin called to ask if i was done praying and i answered in the negative. It's been 2 months and I still haven't given Tosin a reply despite knowing he is the one for me.
Usually, after service every Sunday, he comes to meet me and we talk for a while before he sees me off home but one Sunday afternoon, after the service, i waited for Tosin to come meet me after the choir's closing prayer but he didn't. Instead, he went around socialising with other sisters in the church. I felt a bit jealous and when i couldn't take it any longer, i went home.
On my way home, i started to think.
-What if he's actually tired of waiting for me? What if he found someone else already? But if it was really God who brought him to me, why should he go for someone else? He should wait. By the way, what exactly am i waiting for? Nothing o- i chuckled
-But it's still too soon na. I don't want one brother to start calling me cheap. Never!-