NOT HER REFLECTION by Sobowale Olufunke


Tears ran down my cheek as the event of what happened yesterday kept flashing back to my memory. I couldn't believe I was raped, my virginity? I have succeeded in keeping my virginity for the past 25years. 

I am Olanrewaju Ifeoluwa the first child of Mr and Mrs Olarenwaju. I lost my mother at the age of 16 and we are left with our dad and my two other siblings. 

Things have not been going well since the death of my mum. She died of Tuberculosis (TB), so people do run away from I and my siblings because the TB story do scare them.

My dad remarried two months after my mum's death, leaving the myself and my siblings hopeless.

My sibling's responsibilities were on me so much that I had to drop out of school. I was in SSS 3 and I had to do some menial jobs like working in a soap factory at Fatai Atere road, Lagos; cleaning the floor in PZ cusson company also, just for the survival of I and my siblings.

My immediate younger sister was 13years while our younger brother born was 8years old. My sister Tofunmi had to drop out of school, she worked as a sales girl in a boutique because we didn't want our junior brother to suffer. We wanted him to further his education and he was so young.

After my dad remarried, his wife treated us like we were slaves, I had to save some money to rent a small room at Mushin Olosha for the three of us to manage. 

On the long run, Edwin who is a cultist kept on disturbing me to be his girlfriend but I declined his request because I didn't want to have anything to do with a cultist, but I didn't know that I was getting into trouble. 

On my way back from work around 10pm, I got lost in thought. 

-O lord, I feel lost, I feel dejected WHY ME? as I want to write down my story, I feel there is no hope, I need help, I need someone by my side, I need peace, is it a crime not to have a mother? Why did all my relatives, friends most especially my dad forget I and my siblings?- I knew life was unfair. My questions were rhetorical. I had no one to provide me with answers.

Wanting to write this incident makes me feel broken, I feel shattered, my sister Tofunmi who is now 22 kept on saying " Ife, please forget about this, let's go to the Hospital so that you can have a checkup, you know we still have to move on, this is not the end".

On the other side, Shina who is now 17years old looked at me with tears, he kept on talking about revenge.

"Shut up, Shina, don't even go near Edwin, don't try to move near him or any of his gang, don't you know he's a cultist?".

Tofunmi scolded him while I just stared at my wet diary.

I hadn't written anything, my hands couldn't move, and appetite was lost. Edwin had spoilt my life.

" Sister Ife, please let us go to the hospital." Tofunmi broke the silence in the room.

"For what?" I replied angrily.

"We are not sure if all these guys have any disease, ehn, please I don't want you to have any disease." Tofunmi said crying.

"Sister Mi" as Shina will always call me. "it is true! let's do what sis Tofunmi said o."

I agreed even though I wasn't in my right sense. I don't want any complications in my body again. I have to make sure that I'm clean.

I closed my diary and dropped it under the pillow


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