Five big lies African parents told their kids

Let’s start with a definition to make this go all well. And when I mean definition, I don’t mean we looking up the dictionary like solutions to problems are now lost in book pages.
This is just me telling you what I mean by what I mean.
These big lies African parents told are lies I heard parents tell from where I come from. I am a Nigerian and even friends all over the country have testified to their parents telling them some of these lies.
Some in some sort of format. Some are clear superstition we all know to be lies. Some were pure lies.
Can we cut off all the epistle and hit number 1? Thank you.

  1. Don't stay near the wall when it rains.
    Let me break this down. African parents would make it sound like all evil are trails on lightening.
    They warn you never to stay close to the window whenever it rains. Consequence!? Thunder might fire you.

  2. The mortar and the sitter.
    Pounded yam is one major delicacy in Nigeria. Say, it would be less fair if we do the pounded yam talking and can’t even say a few things about what makes it up. The mortar used in pounding the yam, now turns victim.
    African mom would tell you not to sit on mortars. Stating the fact that if you mistakenly fart while sitting on the mortar, nobody would feel satisfied from the pounded yam made from the mortar after then. No matter how much of the pounded yam eaten.

  3. The leg jumper.
    This goes thus, you must not cross anyone’s leg. If you do, you have to cross back. Unless, your children would look like the person whose leg you have crossed. The trouble starts when you cross the leg of someone ugly.

  4. How to goatalize a goat.
    My grandmum used to tell me all this then and I believed. She told me how to make a goat sleep.
    Make a …(I don’t know what this thing is called in English, but I know its made of cloth rolled up to stay under the head when you try to carry something.) You place that thing on a goat's head right between its horn and it sleeps away. That never worked.

  5. The Knife Cutter.
    Mom said this and I quote: If you eat with a kitchen knife, your dentition would be so much affected that two teeth might grow off one gum.

    Remember that time you were told Nigeria played India and we won them 1: 99? This lie was too obvious but a lot believed. How will you score 1 and still win a match over someone who scored 99? Don’t you dare forget the ball that turned into lion and then a stone. (Shaolin soccer, Oshey!)
    I promised Five and I said Six you